Time

 I mentioned in the last blog that I don't have the time to game that I used to. It's honestly why I stopped streaming. I'm writing a novel, my wife and I opened our own business, and while I enjoyed streaming a lot I was never going to put the effort in to be serious about it. I enjoyed streaming, playing games and chatting with those folks that came by to see what I was up to, friends wondering what I was up to, new people wondering about the game or just interested in talking. It was fun and, as I live ... shall we say 'off the beaten path' it gave me a bit of socialization that I missed ... the hanging out with friends and playing a game.

 I mean when I was younger, a lot of the games my friends and I liked weren't necessarily multiplayer games ... story driven RPGs, Flight Sims, or a lot of the ones that were were turn based strategy games, but we'd hang out, play, joke, and laugh watching each other, congratulating the player on a great move, or laughing at an epic failure. It was fun, but I never wanted to be a 'big' streamer, a few regulars to laugh and joke with was about it. And with so many pulls on my time, I just had to come to terms with the fact that, unless I won the lottery, spending time on something like that ... something I had no intention of really putting the work in for or really any desire to improve ... wasn't really the best use of my limited time. I still game, mostly with my wife and we have a ton of fun, but there's still something missing.

I'd love to get back to role playing ... but who has the time? Again ... I live at least an hour away from literally anyone I know ... Most of the people other than my wife that I consider friends are in different states if not countries. We could use online systems ... I've used Roll 20 in the past and it's a good system, but still, getting a time that works for a group isn't easy... especially when I am usually working nights.

Monday thru Friday forget it, even if I wasn't tied up with working, sleeping, commuting, or my writing it's not like anyone else would have time to do anything ... not counting that working nights means I would be AT work when most people would have free time in the evening. 

Saturday? Working nights means I often don't get home until early Saturday morning, so half of it is spent asleep, then when I get up I have all of the stuff around the house that I didn't have time for during the week as well as keeping up with business stuff (photos, listings, . I get a little time to chill with the wife in the evening before she passes out having become a *shudders* morning person.

Sunday? I mean technically this IS my free day, mainly that means playing games with the wife and painting, and trying not to think of the mountain of things that still need to be done. Sure, I could arrange time to do things on a Sunday afternoon once in a while, but unless my wife is going to join me, I'd be giving up my limited time with her to do it ... and again ... unless it's online travel time is not to be forgotten, going down to ATL to play games with friends (which I do occasionally if I can get schedules to line up) is a 2 hour round trip, I'm not just going to go down there for a 1 hour gaming session, it's going to be for an afternoon. Likewise I'm not going to ask my friends to come out to me, unless I can dedicate an afternoon of games to make it worth the cost of gas.

Wow ... this got way more depressing than I intended. But it does illustrate why I gave up streaming, just not enough hours in the day, enough days in the week. I enjoy a lot of what I do ... my job, painting, the company my wife and I have started and my writing, but that doesn't mean that I don't miss other things too. I'll keep gaming on Saturday evening and Sunday ... I'll keep plugging away at my book ... and painting my little plastic soldiers .... wishing I had more time to do all of it .... and more time to do other things too.